Things I'm Doing to Feel Better
a humble update
Listen, I try not to write too much about my feelings and fears publicly because I don’t see the point in burdening hearts and minds that are already overburdened.
But I am coming to you, humbly, with the triumphant energy of someone who just recovered from the common cold. And I’m ready for this email that has been dancing around my drafts folder to see the light of day.
Last week was rough: the first week of a tangle of chemistry, biology, and math classes occurring at the same time as I was being struck down bad by a cold virus that made me feel like I was falling behind just as we were getting started.
That and the full body horror of learning that the phrase “climate change” is being scrubbed from the websites and agendas of the very organizations with the best chances of fighting it. With each new absurd and inhuman order that comes from the oval office - I have to remind myself that this is the whole game plan: to overwhelm.
And somewhere beyond the overwhelm, there is this kernel of truth: we don’t ever have to stop treating each other and the Earth with respect. Even when systems for doing so are breaking down around us - we will create new and stronger ones. I’m mentally linking arms with everyone reading this who is continuing to do the beautiful work of caring for people and the planet - even when we lose our paychecks for doing so.
So, here is a list of things I’ve been doing to feel less overwhelmed, more engaged with humanity, connected to our beautiful planet and generally better.
1. I am in a bunch of encrypted chats with my extended neighbors about everything from local politics to herbs to geopolitics. I can donate jackets to the local warm clothes drive, support an olive farmer in the West Bank and receive incredible Palestinian olive oil, or meet someone from the town over who fixes all my broken lamps and then becomes my friend over a shared love of Irish history and nerding out on gardening and plant chemistry. I don’t think these chats are endemic to western mass - put your tendrils out and find some near you!
2. I moved my studio from one room to another. A huge, annoying thing to do - but so worth it. This new room is a better fit. There is a big window and two glass doors that lead out onto a back deck and into the backyard. The deck will be an ideal place to set up my copper still to make hydrosols and brew dye pots.
Before I got sick with a cold, I was feverishly painting the walls in preparation for this big move as I listened to Quantum Physics in Irish Mythology by The Blindboy Podcast. The podcast blew my mind and inspired me and it feels like a little bit of that magic is now in my studio forever. I don’t want to explain it - just listen to the dulcet tones of Blindboy for yourself. I’m still working on the finishing touches: furniture, art, lighting. Here is a progress pic:
3. During my semester break we had a few friends come stay in the guest room I recently finished setting up. One of the many reasons we decided to pursue fixing up a big, old house is that it has ample space to host guests - something that our previous tiny, open-format type house lacked. I warned these friends, “please know the kitchen and bathrooms are not cute yet” and fortunately they reminded me that they are not visiting for the facilities. It’s been a treat to show them our many works in progress.
Chanelle came and played a show at our local bookshop that was so good it made me want to play music again (!!), Tanya brought us almost indescribably delicious ferments, which we all ate as we had heart to hearts by the fire, and Hannah rolled in just in time for a cold snap that afforded us clear skies for planet gazing (there is a big planetary alignment happening with many visible planets!) and the motivation to visit our local sauna. My mom and her partner visited and helped us upgrade our electrical panel which was a huge learning experience and absolutely vital for our transition away from fossil fuels. We can’t wait to have everyone back and to welcome more friends to the space. Aiming to have some workshops and gatherings here once it’s warm again.
4. Hayden and I are planning our 2025 garden and placing our seed orders. It’s SO exciting! A great way to spend a Saturday morning. I’ll share my roster of native perennials, herbs, flowers, and vegetables with you once it is set. I’m really excited to grow more food this year (remembering back to my vegetable farming days!) and also to purchase a CSA from a local farm. All signs point to grocery store prices rising so it is a safe bet to invest in your local farmers. My plan is to preserve as much food and medicine and beauty as I can between my own garden and my share of a CSA.
(If you need immediate inspiration maybe you will enjoy these lists I made last year of some of my favorite plants. Native herbs, non-native herbs, native medicinal shrubs, native medicinal trees)
5. I walk all around my neighborhood, the bordering woods, and up the frozen river with Grua every day. I breathe cold air. My mailman hugs me. I sit at the cafe and see people who make me smile. It’s just good to move my body, see people, and be seen.
6. I thread a mix of trail running, strength training classes, and flexibility practices through my week. I love my local YMCA and I don’t know what I would do without it. They even have a sauna. Next week’s newsletter is already written and it is all about winter adventuring + a trip report.
7. Planning my outfits. This might seem silly but how are you going to have time to go out for a run or walk in the icy cold before work if you don’t already have your workout gear folded next to your bed and your regular outfit selected so you don’t have to think about it when you’re brewing tea and showering and whatever else you do to get ready for the day. It’s much easier to rise when it’s dark and cold when you have fleecy running tights and a wool top folded on your nightstand all ready for you. Plus I like the little ritual of picking things out the night before and laying them out for myself - a little gift from past me.
8. I’m asking for help when I need it without embarrassment. This is how I am getting through all of my hard classes. I already have some funny stories from this realm but I think I have to wait until the end of the semester to share them.
9. I’m drinking truly huge amounts of tea and lemon water. I seem to always have a mug of something hot with me at home and when I go to class I bring one of those thermoses where the top doubles as a cute little cup and I love to sit there drinking my burdock root brew or raspberry leaf tisane out of it.
10. I’m looking forward to attending this workshop happening Sunday, February 23rd:
From the Herban Cura website:
“War leaves behind a toxic legacy that devastates ecosystems, contaminates water sources, and harms communities for generations after. Explosives, heavy metals, white phosphorus, and other chemicals can linger in the soil and water, posing long-term threats to health and food security. This knowledge share will provide an introduction to bioremediation — the practice of allying with living organisms to detoxify and regenerate contaminated soils and water. Participants will learn how to work with plants, fungi, beneficial microorganisms, and other regenerative remedies to remove, neutralize, or break down the toxic contaminants left by war. We will explore how bioremediation can help restore contaminated and damaged farmlands, heal ecosystems, protect water resources, and support healthy food systems in war-impacted areas. Where wars specifically seek to destroy and poison the land to make it uninhabitable for the peoples of that place, bioremediation is resistance, remedy, and resilience. Highlighting strategies for practical, place-based, and community-centered approaches to ecological healing, we will hold the realities of Palestine, Lebanon, and Ukraine in our hearts and as our guide. Join us for an honest and hopeful exploration of bioremediation possibilities for healing the ecological wounds and toxic realities of war and genocide.”
Learn more and register here.
Wrapping up this update with some words from David Lynch, who died last month. I’ve always felt unreasonably close to him, like we share something (we’ve never met). He lived in Philly for a few years before he released Eraserhead, his break out film which introduced me to him some 30 years after it came out. He was often quoted saying horrific things about his time in Philadelphia and also citing it as his biggest influence. If you know you know!
Love,
Geraldine
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🧡🧡🧡